Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
operation have a gay friend backfired
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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