Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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