I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
