he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
