Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future�
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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