Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
