I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Welp...herpes.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
