let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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