Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize
