booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize
