I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
