can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
not ubering you a puppy
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize
