On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Randomize
