but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
