Your tits are I can't wait for
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
