Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I just threw up on my dentist
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
