Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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