i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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