I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
