I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
