thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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