we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
We're not piercing ourselves today.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
