Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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