Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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