everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
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