No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
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