soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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