so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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