i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
