Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize