We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
