STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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