i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
