Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
