IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
