I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Randomize
