I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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