Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
