i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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