Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Randomize
