and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Randomize
