Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
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