physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize
