There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
