Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
