Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
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