Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Randomize
