My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Randomize
