also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
