The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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